The Essential Trick To Nailing All Your Goals
For a long time I was stuck in a pattern of setting the wrong goals. It wasn't that my aspirations were bad or unattainable, it was the fact that they weren't aligned with what I call my "Soul Feelings." A Soul Feeling is an emotional state you crave that springs from the desires of your true self. It's the feelings you experience when you're being the most authentic, the ones that you feel deep in your bones, the ones that come from a heart space. And if these feelings aren't showing up in your goal. . . as the Magic 8 Ball says, "outlook not good."
Everyone has different Soul Feelings, and if you want to tap into the best way to choose the right goals for you and stick with it until achieving the awesome outcomes, you need to identify those bad boys. Soul Feelings are the secret sauce for goals because it directs you toward the emotional payout. If you take a look at why you do just about anything you'll discover it's for the way it makes you feel. Landing that promotion doesn't make your blood pump just because you snagged that goal by the tail, it's because it brings you all manner of Soul Feelings. With this new position you can now save more money for retirement (which makes you feel secure), lead more employees (which makes you feel empowered), and conquer new challenges (which makes you feel confident). Way to go, you!
The reason I've fallen flat on many, MANY goals is because I didn't check in with how in tune the journey and results were with my authenticity meter. There is a such a beautiful, broad spectrum of emotions out there, but only a handful resonate with me on a core level. The problem that I encountered over and over again was trying to emulate other people's experience. If I noticed a particular person enjoying success, I would try to do what they were doing — and end up feeling like a truck stop toilet seat every time. It took me years to realize that what I was seeing when I witnessed someone crushing it at life and happiness was their ability to tap into their Soul Feelings and leverage it for success.
I'll share with you the simple process I used to determine my Soul Feelings, so you can do the same. Through this process I learned my Soul Feelings are: empowerment, fun, joy, security, ease, confidence, love and invigorating. Although goals have the potential to span a breadth of emotions, as long as I can pull these key feelings into the experience I move the needle forward on my potential for success.
Here's what you can do to discover your Soul Feelings and start using these emotional outcomes as a guide for your goals.
Using four pieces of paper, write each of the following words on its own page: Health, Relationships, Career, Self.
One at a time, think about each topic at the top of the page and list all the things you want and dream of for that area of your life.
To love my work
To be excited every day about work
To help others
Opportunities for advancement
After you have made a list under all four topics, ask yourself WHY you want these things. This will help you start to understand your Soul Feelings. Even if it's not apparent at first, it will come.
I want fun co-workers
WHY: Because it's more enjoyable to go to the office every day. Because I feed off the good energy of others. Because it creates a sense of community.
Dig deeper into your answers to "why?" and see what emotions you can pin point.
I want fun co-workers
WHY: Because it makes it more enjoyable to go to the office every day. Because I feed off the good energy of others. Because it creates a sense of community.
FEELINGS: enjoyable, fun, happy, inclusive, energetic
After you've sifted through the possible feelings for each topic, see if you notice any repetitive words and explore how much they resonate with you when you say them out loud.
Keep going with this exercise until you have a short list of words that you identify with on an authentic, soulful level. Come back to these words when you're starting a new goal or revisiting an old one and see how your Soul Feelings measure up with what you're embarking on.
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